How Much is Truly 'About Me'?
This is the picture I'd use on any other website. Here it makes me uncomfortable. I feel too blond, too white. I will use it anyway because it is my insecurity about my place in conversations about race and privilege and equity that often causes me to shy away. But I don't want to do that anymore. So I need to learn to deal with the fact that I'm this white, and blond.
I'm an east-coaster living in the midwest. I run a business that empowers women entrepreneurs. I hope to be involved in many more great organizations and businesses over my career. I spend much of my time raising three little people to (hopefully) be bighearted, just, and courageous. I need help figuring out how to best do that. I've spent too much time recently tongue-tied when it comes to race. Now I'm talking about how Racism is My Problem, Too.
"skinny language" is from a poem by Nayyirah Waheed
"my english is broken.
have to try harder to understand
breaking this language
you so love
is my pleasure.
in your arrogance
you presume that i want your skinny language.
that my mouth is building a room for
in the back of my throat.
it is not.
- i have seven different words for love. you only have one. that makes a lot of sense."
The name "parenting while white":
I have mixed feelings on it. It feels kitschy. I don't like that it's co-opted from such a serious problem of racial profiling: DWB - driving while black, which in and of itself is co-opted from DWI. But I do like that it's descriptive. I like that it makes the point that "parenting while white" is not just "parenting". The experience of 'parenting while white' is fraught. If I don't think about what I'm doing then I'm siding with injustice. Even if I do aim for a more deliberative focus on raising kids that see race and value social justice I'm going to fuck up a lot along the way. It doesn't feel easy and it shouldn't. It's my privilege to stop anytime, any day, and pull back into my comfort zone. I hope I don't.