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How Much is Truly 'About Me'?

The truth:

This is the picture I'd use on any other website. Here it makes me uncomfortable. I feel too blond, too white. I will use it anyway because it is my insecurity about my place in conversations about race and privilege and equity that often causes me to shy away. But I don't want to do that anymore. So I need to learn to deal with the fact that I'm this white, and blond.

The details:

I'm an east-coaster living in the midwest. I run a business that empowers women entrepreneurs. I hope to be involved in many more great organizations and businesses over my career. I spend much of my time raising three little people to (hopefully) be bighearted, just, and courageous. I need help figuring out how to best do that. I've spent too much time recently tongue-tied when it comes to race. Now I'm talking about how Racism is My Problem, Too.

The reference:

"skinny language" is from a poem by Nayyirah Waheed

"my english is broken.
on purpose.
you
have to try harder to understand
me.
breaking this language
you so love
is my pleasure.
in your arrogance
you presume that i want your skinny language.
that my mouth is building a room for
it
in the back of my throat.
it is not.

- i have seven different words for love. you only have one. that makes a lot of sense."

The name "parenting while white":

I have mixed feelings on it. It feels kitschy. I don't like that it's co-opted from such a serious problem of racial profiling: DWB - driving while black, which in and of itself is co-opted from DWI. But I do like that it's descriptive. I like that it makes the point that "parenting while white" is not just "parenting". The experience of 'parenting while white' is fraught. If I don't think about what I'm doing then I'm siding with injustice. Even if I do aim for a more deliberative focus on raising kids that see race and value social justice I'm going to fuck up a lot along the way. It doesn't feel easy and it shouldn't. It's my privilege to stop anytime, any day, and pull back into my comfort zone. I hope I don't.